1989_11 The Daily Collegian November 1989

              Page 4    Thursday. November 9,1989
The Daily Collegian
Confusion surrounds
chemical warfare issue
By Cyn t hia D. Baxter
StaffWriter
Ambiguities mixed with uncon¬
firmed allegations and anxieties
between countries surround tbe
Issue of chemical warfare tn the
1980s.
These ambiguities include po¬
litical motivations, inability to
define what a chemical weapon is,
and misleading public perception
that warfare chemicals are easily
produced.    .
These ideas were the focus of a
campus lecture held Tuesday by
Cordon Burck, staff associate in
chemical and biological warfare of
the Federation of American Scien¬
tists.
The lecture, titled "Chemical
Proliferation: Allegations. Ambig¬
uities and Anxieties," was spoo*
sored Jointly by the CSUF Chem¬
istry Department and the Peace
and Conflict Stud ies Program.
Estimates of the, number of
countries believed to be using
chemical weapons differ widely, he
said. An example of the the
inaccuracy of numbers is a Boston
Globe article that said, "There are
no fewer than four countries
fproducing chemical weapons), but
maybe more."
Other reports by many countries
predict that as many as 20
countries may be developing
chemjeal weapons. *-~,
Another problem with deter¬
mining which countries are de¬
veloping chemical warfare ts that
some . countries     are     counted
that have a chemistry industry
capable of produdng toxic warfare
chemicals, but do not necessarily
have a stockpile of chem1ca:
weapons, said Burck.
The anxieties of countries have
about chemical proliferation are
based on allegations.
"Allegations are usually found
to be mistaken." he said. The
allegations escalate tensions."'
This anxiety about chemical
warfare increases Interest In the
enemy and force a country to
defensively have a larger chemical
program. "Planning Of chemical
defense can be construed as
interest in a chemical attack." he
said
TJhls is based on the factor of
discriminating between the use of
chemical weapons for offensive or
defensive purposes.
"Washington Is desperately try¬
ing to come up with a definition."
said Burke.
Based on a Chemical Weapons
Convention, countries have the
policy of."no flrst use," said Burke.
He said this means countries think
that they can justifiably use
chemical warfare if it is used on
them.
Because of immense anxiety.
that treaty model is not going to
work again, said Burck.
1 would advocate that the U. S.
end production of the chemicals."
besaid.
The U. S. budget for chemical
warfare this year Is approximately
$1 billion, said Burck. This
number consists of the research
and equipment and training that
goes along with chemical defense.
Commandos invade
Show survives Wong's poor opening
ByAUtaLoe
News Editor
Having the comedy duo Mary Wong
as the opening act at CSUF Wednesday
night was like listening to a grammar
school orchestra before the
philharmonic; anything after that
would sound good
Comedian David Naster and
Timothy Miller and All as Mary Wong
were the Comedy Commandos brought
to the Satellite Student Union by
KRZR 103.7 and Coors Light
As the opening act. Mary Wong gave
students the usual predictable college
comedy fore: Jokes about stereotypical
blacks, big breasts, sports, parents,
gang violence and homosexuals.
The best part of their act was when
they criticized honor movies.
"Freddy Kreugen Michael Jackson
with an attitude,* they said. "What lf
•Jason chased someone into a hockey
rink...he picks up [Wayne] Gretzky
and chops his head off. The crowd goes
wild... the guy must be a goalie.
"Jason In the penally box. with a
head on a stick in one hand and a $2
million contract in the other."
While the audience was fairly quiet
during Mary Wongs act, -the crowd
came to life during David Naster's
portion ofthe show.
Naster, who resembled a mellowed-
out Robin Williams, resplendent in
pink, purple and orange dotted
balloon pants, brought some fresh
humor to the show.
While Mary Wong did not Interact
with the audience, Naster brought the
audience into the act, playing off of
hecklers-*xpertly.
His alcohol Jokes were actually
funny and at least the punch lines
were surprises, such as comparing
people who abuse alcohol and sue the
beer company to someone who eats
too many desserts and sues Hostess.
On the topic of fitness. Naster said
the Nautilus machine was "left over
from the Spanish Inquisition."
Although he did add the usual
religious/dumb southerner Jokes to
his act, at least they were funny: "I
went to Alabama and they didn't
know about Jews, they had to get out
the pocket dictionary...bagel. I know
that that's a dog. Why would you put
cream cheese on a dog?"
But Naster really shined when he
reacted with the audience, taking out
drum sticks and a kazoo and asking
for requests. Naster seemed to'enjoy
what he was doing and wanted the
audience to have fun. too.
His musical repertoire included
theme songs from "Hawaii Ftve-O," "I
Dream of Jeannie" and "The Brady
Bunch." He even had a clap-along and
challenged an audience member to his
own version of dueling banjos, only
they used their hands and two stools.
Naster had good advice on how to
make flying on an airplane safer pay
when you get there.
The show was worth the price after
hearing Naster. but the audience
deserved a better act than Mary Wong,
especially after making people wait
over half an hour before starting the
show.
One dud and one direct hit — not
bad for $2.
J
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