1975_12 The Daily Collegian December 1975

              -
f   4—THE DAILY COLLEGIAN       Thursday, December 11, 1975
Gawd declares herself Empress, imposes martia
(Continued from Page 1)
"Let's get away from here,
Dooble,* said Ruddy Ross to fellow senator DoobleTexacos. They
sashayed out of the room.
"I move the meeting be adjourned," said Gary Shmlilson to
whomever was left to listen.
Nobody cared to second the
motion, and Gawd stepped ln.
Later, Senator Lola Rlchper-
son said she was "disappointed*
ln the Senate meeting. 1 worked
hard to keep tempers at a coal
level," she said.
1 think It Is Important that we
all talk calmly, quietly . . . you
know, nice and neat.'Rlchperson
said.
Other campus reaction to the
Gawd takeover and the Senate's
dlsbandment was negative.
WON'T GO EASILY
Daffy Collusion editor Bob
C ruddy, interviewed ln the hills
where he said he would set up a
guerrilla movement to recapture
the campus, vowed, "she'll never
take me alive."
"This will raise hell with my
budget   request  to  the Senate,"
C ruddy added. "I was going to ask
$100,000 for a printing press, and
$30,000 for the Retired Editors''
Pension Fund. Now they probably* won't   give   us a penny.*
Temporary CSUF President
Normal Baasted, through his director of public misinformation
Wee Donny Wlnklee, declined to
take a stand on the Gawd move,
which he labeled a 'student matter.*
•President Baasted believes ln
student autonomy, unless, of
course. It's something that hits
him where he lives, like the
Faculty Lounge," explained Wlnklee.
Asked to comment on Baasted's
remarks. Gawd would only smile
and say, "he's next."
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Karnpus Kalendar
THURSDAY
2 a.m. — The Insomniac Club
will try to hold a, sleep-In at the
College Union. Hank Snow records will be played.
1 p.m. — The Indoor adventure
club will sponsor a hike around
Dave Nlxsonlan's mouth. Bring a
lunch.
4 p.m. - The Aggie Club will
sponsor Its annual boot bottom
scraping contest ln the CSUF
barn. Popslcle sticks provided
free.
10 p.m.—The Decision-Makers
Club will meet to hear an ad-
Iress by AS President David
Lice III on "cutting through the
red tape and getting to the heart
of the matter without acting hastily or compromising the principles which made this country
great,"
FRIDAY
1 a.m. — The Students for New
Stadium (SNS) will meet In? a
phone booth on the corner of
First and Tulare.
3 a.m. — The Bulldog grave-
rnhblng club will meet at the U-
stabem. We Slabbem Mortuary
tor a tour. Free samples will be
irovlded.
3 p.m., or 4 p.m. or maybe
j p.m.—The prognostlcators club
WIU meet today. Or maybe tomorrow, If they're doing some-
mliig today. They have all been
i.usy.
4 p.m. - The Students Against
Burn books
for fuel?
(Continued from /age 1)
Leaving said studies were being made on the possible use of
looks for fuel. "We cculd turn
>'■< all the electricity for the
»Mole school, and burn the books
lur fuel. We understand that en-
■ nonmental groups might oppose
::, but we are looking Into lt.Our
Uwyers are doing research
iw," he said.
leaving added the unlvflklty
mid easily pay up the SI million
is and electricity bill by selling
•>kles ln the quad. "1 figure
- '1,000 chocolate chip cookies at
•luarter a piece will be a good
art."
Thursday, December 11, 1978 '   THE DAILY COLLEGIAN-5
Topless in old cafeteria
the Stadium (SAS) will meet In
the gym. The doors will be closed
alter It Is full. Overflow will be
directed to-theWomen'sGym.
4 p.m. - The Vacillation Club
will meet somewhere or other.
Senator David Sofa will speak
on "How to quit the Student Senate 82 times ln a single semester, and still be around at the
end to cuss out your fellow senators." No pricks allowed. Bring
your own nameplate.
4:30 p.m. - The Kurd Student
Union will meet on top of the
College Union. Bring your own
scimitar and Moslem heads.
6 p.m. — The Student Government Morality Club will meet ln
Its usual place, the College Union
basement: Guest lecturers Susan
Gawd and David Nlxsonlan will
speak on 'Ethical responsibility
In student government; how to
avoid It.*
8 p.m. - TheHand-ln-the-TUl
Club will meet ln the sow's pen
behind the Agriculture Department to hear a talk by Susan
Gawd titled "Fee'dlng at the public
trough: perils and rewards."
SATURDAY
2 p.m. - The CSUF Outside
Adventure Club will meet on top
of the campus water tower for a
short gathering. Ropes and grappling hooks will be provided.
4 p.m. - the Students for Apathy Club may meet today, but then
again, they may not. In fact, who
cares?
INDEFINITE
' The mind reading club will be
meeting this week. Students
should be able to determine the
time, day and room by applying
Ulelr hobby to practical use.
MB
«e>
by Diz Mount
The old cafeteria will bo turned
Into a combination beer hall-
movie theater during the Christmas break,- CSUF President Dr.
Normal A. Baasted announced
today.
The move ends a long administration search for a proper way
to use the vacant facility.
*A bunch of deadheads killed
the faculty lounge Idea,' Baasted
grumbled, "but this will accomplish the same purpose."
"Some ninnies actually wanted
to use the place for a Library,'
he added under his breath.
Under Baasted's plan the first
floor will become a topless beer-
bar, featuring top dancers from
around the country. Carol Dodo,
the blond with the famous sill-
cone 44's from San Francisco,
Is expected to headline the opening snow.
The top floor will be turned
Into a porno movie theater, and a
double bill of *Deap Throat* and
•Behind the Green Door* will kick
off the semester's action-packed
schedule, Baasted said.
Tuesdays and Thursdays will
be "Ladles Day,* he said, with
guys replacing the girls as dancers. This, evidently, Is In response to a demand by CSUF's
NOW (National Organization of
Women) (action tor equal facilities and opportunities on campus.
Baasted denied rumors that a
massage parlor will be opened
tor student use In the International room ot the cafeteria.
'The massage parlor will be
for the use of faculty and their
guests only,* be said. -It will
be totally Independent from the
porno movie-beer hall set up.
It will be financed entirely by
membership fees. We're recruiting girls recently .brown
out ot work by local police who
raided several parlors downtown.
The faculty needs a place of their
own. where they can relax.*
Thieves cross moat, rob Baasted
by Jim Deadman
CFSU president Normal Baasted's 265 room Victorian castle
In' Fig Garden city was robbed
last night of red tape valued at
over $3 million dollars, and other
goodies.
Security chief Dagwood Bum-
blebrldge said three burglars
posing as traveling caviar merchants were granted entrance
over the castle's 20-foot, piranha-filled moat when they offered the head chef a special
pre-Chrlstmas discount on bullshit soup.
The soup, a favorite of Baasted,
anmnm
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masked burglars tied up the chef
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Besides the red tape, other
Items missing from the house
included a closet of tanned faculty
skeletons, a gun with notches on
it, a matching pair of gold booties,
and three nickel bags.
The only clue Bumblebrldge
found was a teacher's edition of
' "Geography," with the Initials
"C.C." Inside. "»
Baasted said after the robbery,
'Well, no great loss, I can always
get another closetof faculty skeletons and 1 already have a secret
basement room full of red tape.*
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