1977_09 The Daily Collegian September 1977

              'Star Bores'; Adventures of Puke Flyswatter
STAR'BORES
From The Adventures of Puke Flyswatter
byG"rg* L*e-s
Another galaxy, a
of Ume.
The Old Monarchy was th* Monarchy of legend, greater
than a speeding bullet, able to leap parsecs In a single
bound. It was great. No need to know where, whence or
why..Jt was important merely to know that, like rlng-
around-the-collar, it did exist. Somewhere. Sometime.
Once upon a time, udder the wise rule of the House of
Commons and the Redeye Knights (who formed the House
of Lords), the Monarchy flourished, growing ever lar-
ger. But as often happens when wealth and strength pass
beyond the enviable and become the reverent, there appear those whose greed for power Is matched only by
the corruption of their souls. So was the Monarchy
at its peak. Like the greatest of weeds, capable of
withstanding any external attack, the Monarchy wilted
from within, the darkness of greedy souls cutting-off
Its source of llcht. \^
Aided by grasping Individuals within the government,
and by business leaders whose conglomeration spanned
the galaxy, the ambitious Senator Palpidlamln became
leader of the Monarchy, promisingto"bringus together"
Once In power, though, he became a secretive, almost
furtive Individual, shutting his ears to the cries of the
populace.  Surrounded  by   sychophants and toe-llckers,
put him In office.
Hiving eliminated through treachery and their own
stupidity, the Redeye Knights, guardians of the galaxy. Senator Palpidlamln declared himself "protector
of the Universe, Ruler of the Galaxy and King for Life."
He and his now-royal cohorts prepared to Instigate
a   reign  of terror  throughout  the galaxy such had not
The people still had their champions, however. Some
solar systems with more iosmlc gumption than most
formed a rebel alliance and fought back against the
dreaded near-omnipotence of ihe new Monarchy.
From the start, these rebel systems were vastly out-
From the First Ode
J
Rook of the WongU.es
It was perhaps the most unprepossessing piece of rock
In the universe. At the  farthest end of tha galaxy of
Spanlardo, It had become the butt of all jokes. Sandy,
arid, cursed by blistering winds that threatened to tear
Its   Inhabitants   from  their precarious  holds, Spltoon
was  hardly the place one "would choose to visit, let
Far above the surface/ Uke a wlno's daydream, hung
its three suns; each a different color, they were united
only In the heat they managed to generate at Spltoon,
which was (as stated earlier) bllstertng.
The drunken course the galactic cruise ship was traveling- was deliberate, not really the, fault of the Inebriated captain (who had turned the ship's helm over to
more sober hands), but the result of a last-ditch scramble to avoid Uie blazing bolts of force directed at the
i smaller ship by a Royal Cruiser that seemed to fill
half the sky.
In spite of the smaller ship's frantic maneuvertngs,
blasts were getting through Its force-field. On* blast
shook the ship's mid-section, to the extreme consternation of C409 and AC /DC, who were bounced around like
Unt in a dryer.
C409 was the taller of the two droods, for such they
were; robots, but of a make and kind never seen on our
planet In our time. C409 paused In the perpetual polishing of his lean, man-Uke body to stare (If such was
the word) In disgust at his smaller companion's stubby
round metal frame, which had become coated with metal
filings torn loose from the ship's waUs by the last blast.
"ReaUy, AC," C409 began, "you really should take
better cafe of yourself. I declare..." But what he was
blast hltUng almost directly overhead, followed by the
sound of metal tapdanclng on metal.
"What's that?" asked See Fouronlne. AC/DC answered
in a long series of beeping tones, reminiscent of a
Volkswagon horn gone beserk.
"Boarded?" asked C409, having Interpreted the beeps,
"But by who?"
'    He was answered by' an echoing pop a
hatch doors at the end of the corridor burst
number of man-like forms In battle armor ca
forth, firing at the two droods. But wait! They were*
firing at the droods, but beyond them, towards -*■
of the corridor.
C409'a sense got the better of his curiosity and he te.
gan retreating away from* the .Invaders, **""
drood In his wake.   From "
came the.galactic cruise ship's own warriors, hurs*|
blasts past the droods at the enemy. The droods *(r,
caught in a cross-fire! One of the blasts struck C40P|
arm and ricocheted off Into the distance.
"Awkl" yeUed See Fouronlne, "I'm hit! I thinks,
auxiliary cocamamle caraplece Is cauterized! This ij
all your fault, ACI Why did I ever lteten to your lnfen*j
beeping and desert our assigned duty station to
down here with you In the first—ACI ACI
But the little barrel-shaped robot, ignoring C409'
monitions, had disappeared In the direction the emu,
ship's warriors had come from. It seemed to C409 it*
AC/DC was standing In a hatch entrance, in
cation with a human of surprising girth. But It could t,
a hallucination, he reminded himself, after all his dr.
cults had certainly been scrambled by aU the excltil
ment. He ruefully rubbed a poUshcloth over the sent
left by tbe blaster shot that had nicked him. "Fll
beasts", he muttered.
:e when AC/DC eta
The battle had died In th
up to him again, heading
an obstlnant air about him. C409 foUowed.
"Good Idea, AC," he said as he foUowed the >m
drood into the ship.   "Let's get out of here and l*ii
these crazy people.   Why we ever left
matlc station In Palm Beach, I'll
But AC/DC wasnt Ustenlng.  He had already
pod door, pushed the ejector button, and plugged hi row
Into the female coupling of the escape pod's computat
A series of deep, sighing beeps Issued
rotund frame. '
TO BE CONTINUED!   NEXT WEEK:.
Princess  Weighs meets.the dreaded Materds
Dark Lord of the Syphlesses; C409 and AC/DC land en
(you should know).
Letter to the editor
The Collegian
campus. The purpose of
Is being created.
Alan I
white engineer, applied in 1973 to
the University of California, at
Davis, Medical CoUege. He'was
denied admission and tried again-
the following year.
Bakke again was denied, where
he took Ms liberty and decided
to file suit on the grounds of
"reverse discrimination." Bakke said that the special admlss-
walting  for  the  decision of the
If the decision of the Supreme
Court Is to uphold th* Bakke
doclslon, It could have problems.
Minorities then, would lie uffect-
ed to the extent where they would
be admitted to a University or
Graduate School, because of "reverse-reverse  discrimination".
■ For this purpose three other
raUys wiU be held besides the
Sept. 28 rally. There will be a
rally Sept. 30 at Fresno City
College, and another rally held
Oct. 5 at the downtown Federal
Building. Irf this rally we would
like to have a slogan which Is
"Take a step against Bakke."
The final rally wiU ba held
In San Francisco where other
Antl-Bakke organizations wiU
meet together. It ts called National Day ofSolldltary against the
Bakke Decision.
This wiU be held Oct. 15, two
days after Bakka's first bearing.
Step*   must be   taken  to break
what effects Bakke can have.
These are Just preliminary steps
tor the rights that we are
oppressed from.
Fresno Antl-Bakke CoaUUon
Decision (ABCD) is the main
Organization trying to defend and
expand all Third World programs, Affirmative Action pro
sify, r
i.by t
i Slate
wiikii,-.;
s thatyc
support and reaction oi
Bakke decision .is desperately
needed. We can overcome Bakke
by working together as one-
"Unity can defeat".
Robert JaramlUo
Chairman of MEChA PoUtics
College bowl
game set
for October
In the tradition of the mlnd-
• boggling academic video competition of the 50's and 60's, CSUF's
College Union is presenting the
college lx>wl.
A fast-paced game played
Iwtween .two teams of four players each, College Bowl stresses
a wide range of knowledge, emphasizing quick recall of facts.
The College I
I   subscriptions  $6 per semester and $12 per year.  Editorial office: Keats Campjs Building, telephone 487-2266.
Opinions expressed in Collegian editorials and commentaries
are not necessarily those of California State University, Fresno or the student body.
Editor-in-Chief Diane Valetka
Managing Editor     Susan Shroder
Feature Editor Diarwe Soils
Photography Editor. ........ .Sunny Frazler
Sports Editor T John Esparza
Photographer '. Jvlsiissa Baro
Reporters Steve Cavallero, Mike Fitzgerald,
' Gil Fleming, Charmainc Getz, William Gree'ne,
Darreil Maskal, Debra Perez, Donna Reyes, Bill
Ross*. Tim Ryan.
Advertising Manager . Dave Ellis
Productign Manager Bruce Scott
Fuslnesa Manager Becky Holman
Typesetters .Anita Russ, Carol Kissinger
Circulation Jay Brashear
Staff artist John DeGano
Seals and Crofts
win i
n electn
c lock-
on the television version.
The College Bowl will be held
In two sessions, Monday and
Tuesday, Oct. 3 and 4 at noon
In the College Union lounge. Ad-
Ion." This Is vary Important The CoUege Bowl Is presented
that aU oppressed minorities be by the CSUF College Union Pro-
concerned and  trnderstand fully      gram Committee.
IDry Flowers
IABYBREATH       PAMPAS CRASS    SILK FLOWERS     j   with this
STA1 FLOWERS    COLOIED PUFFS STATICE J    acj tr,ro
ASK*^—RIBBONS    j  Oct. 22,
FLORAL SUP PLIES
Dry Flower* Custom ArronB*d      •       '"''
In y«v* containarc *■ —•-
REASONABLE PRICES
DRY FLOWER SHOP
) N BLACKSTONE -
s^^^SSS^^