1997_04 The Daily Collegian April 1997

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THE DAILY
COLLEGIAN
Wednesday, April 2, 1997
VAGABOND
By Doug Lansky
QUEENSTOWN. NEW
ZEALAND — Jet boating is a
thunderous, high-speed trip
down a narrow river gorge. With
a twist. Instead of speeding
down the middle, drivers steer
you so close to the edge you
could almost lean over and get a
shave. The result is a thrill-ride
similar to a roller coaster, only
there's always a chance the
driver could sneeze and ram the
boat into a large rock, spoiling
all the fun.
Riding jet boats has become
>o popular in New Zealand, es¬
pecially with Japanese tourists,
and so many new jet boat com¬
panies have started up. that the
sport is now considered A Ma¬
jor Industry.
I chose to ride with the
Shotover Jet company out of
Quecnstown, on the South Is¬
land of New Zealand, because:
I) it was the world's first jet boat
company, 2) they had the first
brochure I saw that wasn't writ¬
ten in Japanese, and 3) they let
me ride for free with my press
card.
I was driven 10 minutes out¬
side of town on the Shotover Jet
bus. which was owned by the
Shotover Jet Company — a fine
company. Perhaps one of the
World's Finest Companies.
Ever. Man, what a great com¬
pany.
Actually, the bus ride was so
professionally done it nearly
made me nauseous. The*bus
driver played a video, wtherein a
senior jet boat driver told us
Quite frankly about many of the
wonderful things we were about
to experience. The video also
showed so much jet boating
footage that, by the time we
reached Ihe river. I felt like I
could have written a complete
article based entirely on my
simulated experience.
Once off the bus. wc were
given rain jackets and life vests
and sandwiched onto the boat.
In the front row was Todd, the
driver, who, we hoped, did not
have a cold. Next to him was a
young Japanese couple who
couldn't speak English. In the
second row was a Filipino fam-
Jet boating: A
close encounter
with death, for fun
ily of five who also couldn't speak
a word of English. The Filipino
grandfather, who came prepared for
boat spray, was wearing — I as¬
sume this is all the rage in the Phil¬
ippines — a transparent shower
cap. I sat in the third row, wedged
between a Kiwi, two Canucks and
a Brit.
Todd gave us our instructions:
Just sit there and hold on. He cau¬
tioned us against hanging any parts
of our bodies wc planned to keep
over the edge of the boat.
The 2.44-meter-wide, 4.75-
meter-long boat (quite small) took
off and the X. I -liter (comparatively
large) engine sent us flying down
the river al about 70 kilometers per
hour (Fast) for six kilometers (pretty
far).
The Filipino grandfather quickly
realized that his shower cap had not
been designed — aerodynamically-
speaking — to stay on his head.-
Because our velocity created a 70
kph wind (a lot), he decided to wear
the thing on the front of his face.
This evoked much laughter, espe¬
cially among the Canadians and
myself, who were barely able to
breathe. The man's teenage grand¬
son kx)kcd so embarrassed we won¬
dered if he'd ever dare show his
face in New Zealand again.
The way this event worked.
Todd would aim the speeding boat
al the side of the canyon and, just
as we were collectively soiling our
underwear, he'd turn the boat away
at the last possible momenl, miss¬
ing the solid rock wall by the width
of a nasal hair. We had almost
enough time lo sigh in relief before
Todd aimed at the wall on the other
side of the canyon, which in places,
was only 10 meters wide (quite nar¬
row).
Todd also instilled fear in the
passengers by aiming the boa}' at
sandbars in the river. He could do
this very effectively since the jet '
boat only needed 10 centimeters of
water (a small amount) to navigate.
Just when we began to get used
to Todd's obstacle-dodging, he-
would execute a 360-degree spin.
While going 70 kph! The boat
would whip around and we'd get
completely soaked, which, were it
not a cold autumn day, would have
been just great.
Todd would occasionally stop
the boat and give us short bits of
Advertise in
The Daily Collegian
278-5731
background information on the
river, on the jet boat's capabili¬
ties, and on the people who used
to inhabit the area. Naturally,
most of the passengers had no
idea what he was saying because
Todd — silly him — was speak¬
ing English. Todd would stop his
programmed speech after the
first sentence when he saw (he
blank expressions on the Asians'
faces and begin again with
added gestures, which also
failed to convey his message.
Everyone would laugh. He fi¬
nally asked those of us in back
if wc actually wanted to know
any of the information We said
"no."
When the 15-minute ride was
over, we all jumped off with
fearful smiles frozen on our
faces. We were free to wander
through the gift shop and, in my
case, nol purchase any of their
souvenirs, which included an
entire line of Shotover Jet ac¬
tive-wear and stuffed animals
wearing miniature Shotover Jet
active-wear.
I noticed the Filipino grand¬
father had purchased one of
these Shotover Jet animals, and
it was wearing his shower cap.
His grandson was heading in the
direction of Greenland.
Doug Lansky is a travel writer
occasionally found in Minneapo¬
lis. Comments are appreciated
and can he sent care of this news¬
paper or hy e-mail:
Doug Dylan 9aot. com
Applications now
available for the
following positions
for the Fall 1997
semester:
Editor-in-Chief (1)
Supplement Editors
Hye Sharzhoom
La Voz De Aztlan
Uhuru Na Umoja
Application deadline
is April 17.
Applications can be
obtained and returned
to the Associated
Students Office 316.
ACROSS
1 Robert of AJan
5 Serpents
9 Cupid   \
13 Superman's girl
14 County capital
15'A Bel for-*
16 Musical group
18 Divulges
19W.oewKflh
20 Flower feature
21 Wrong
22 Reject
23 Lariat
25 Comes to terms
28 — and dandy
29 Singer Cole
32 Across: pref.
33 Reagan and
Howard/
34 Meadcwtanale
35 Diplomacy
36 - of the crime
38 Play the lead
39 Devoured
40 Additional
41 Relating to the
early part of day
42 Cheering word
43 Gobi-like
44 Shooing stars
45 Beginning
47"- of Fools*
48 Fairy tale
monsters
50 BrarchikJren
52 Actress Farrow
55 Outworn
56 Interrogates
58 Assists
59 Distinct entity
60 Venetian
magistrate
61 Moreor-
62Puntadel-
63 Section
DOWN
1 Medicinal plant
- 2Learning
3 Chop
4 Shade of blonde
5 Items of value
6 Argument
7 Near: pref.
8 Mare's male
9-apple
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10 Puppet on a
string
11 Dolar Mis
12 Singer Diana
15 Shames
17 Swords
22 0penng
24 Jackson or
Bancroft
25 Perfume source
26 Persona non —
27 Track creatures
28 Liberated
30 Expect
31 Aquatic birds
36 Kind of loser
37 Review
38 Coarse hominy
40 Common people
41 Damp
44 Pure
46 Hotbeds
47 Now you —,
now you don't
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