1997_03 The Daily Collegian March 1997

              THE DAILY
COLLEGIAN
Friday, March 7,1997
Weekend
These 'Private Parts' are worth $7.50 to see
By James M. Ward      \ or a "rude, crude, abnoxious. sexist and rac-
The Daily Collegian ist pig" is just a misunderstood family man.
At least that's the main point of Stern's much-
I learned two things about Howard Stern    hyped film adaptation of his best selling au-
watching "Private Parts,": 1) He really loves    tobiography.
his wife and kids and 2) he thinks he has a
small penis.
I'm not sure I ever wanted to know the
latter nugget of information about the self-
proclaimed "King of All Media." In fact, I
can honestly say the size of Mr. Stern's penis
never crossed my mind. But, the fact (evi¬
dently) that he is a deeply commited family
man is — in a very small way — refreshing.
That's right, the man who has been de¬
scribed alternatively as the bad boy of radio
Howard Stern (right) infuriates NBC executive Kenny Rushton
(a.k.a. Pig Vomit) forcing another NBC exec, Vin Vallesca to
intervene in "Private Parts."
The movie opens> with Stern's infamous
appearance as "Fartman" on the MTV Mu¬
sic Awards. After that rather embarrasing
episode, he meets an attractive female pas¬
senger on his flight back to New York and
tells his life story to her. (Which, in most
cases,, would be a nightmare. Who wants tp
sit on an airplane, trapped like a hostage, lis¬
tening to someone babble about their life?)
But, Stern does have an interesting story
to tell. He details his rise from a geeky col¬
lege radio sta¬
tion DJ to the
big-time radio
personality in
New York.
Along the way,
he tells her how
he met his wife
and members of
"his radio fam¬
ily," who all
play themselves
(quite well).
The most
surprising thing
about "Private
Parts" is the
rather sweet
love story be¬
tween Stern and his wife Alison (Mary
McCormack). Their relationship isn't all
warm and fuzzy, though.
In one rather uncomfortable scene, Alison
nearly leaves Stern when he jokes about his
wife's miscarriage one day on his radio show.
Even though I'm not a big fan of Stern's
radio show. (I can listen to it for about 20
minutes before I lose interest and switch sta¬
tions to that other blow-hard of the radio
waves. Rush Limbaugh) I liked "Private
Parts." Stern, and especially his news-reader
Robin Quivers, give likable, natural perfor¬
mances as themselves.
The movie is at its best when it depicts
Stern's battles with management and his
funny, albeit at times obscene, radio bits at
his Washington D.C radio show (he
b rode as ted the first ever on-air orgasm)
His legendary battles with WNBC's man¬
agement (Stern's on-air nickname for his pro¬
gram director, who, for his part, refers to
Stern as the "anti-christ," was "Pig Vomit")
are the comic highlights of the film. There's
one unbelivable scene where a woman "deep
throats" a polish kelbasa (talk about product
placement) in the studio as a horrified studio
tour watches.
The film isn't very insightful about why
Stern is so popular, though. It tries to explain
his sucess by saying people listen to his ra¬
dio show to hear what he is going to say next.
But I don't think that's a very good explana¬
tion. The brodcast industry is full of "shock
jocks" whose acts wear out quickly (Morton
Private
Parts
Rated R
109 minutes
Starring: Howard Stem,
Robin Quivers, Mary McCormack.
Fred Norris & Paul Giamatti
Directed by: Betty Thomas
Written by: Len Blum &
Michael Kalesniko
Opens today at Festival 4
& Broadway Faire 10, Fresno;
UA Sierra Vista, Clovis.
Downey Jr. for example.)
Fans of Stern will probably eat the movie
up. There's the usual number of bare-breasted
women (I counted twelve sets — the major¬
ity rather magnificent) and enough raunchy
humor to satisfy any monosyballic Stern fan
People who don't like Stern, or who have
never listened to his radio show, might be
surprised with this entertaining introduction
into the world of Stern.
In the final analysis, the film is one giant
ego trip — a sort of self-coronation — but at
least it's entertaining as ego trips go. Now I
just pray that Rush Limbaugh won't be in
spired to make a movie out of his life story. I
think one radio blow-hard flim biography ,i
decade is enough.
The 'King of all Media' attacks the Silver Screen
By Ian Spelling
College Press Screening
NEW YORK-Howard Stern
yanks hard at the zipper on his
pants.The self-proclaimed King
of All Media has just made use
of the loo and tucked his paltry
private parts, or so he says they
are, back inside his blue jeans.
After washing his hands. Stern
strides back into a room full of
journalists to promote "Private
Parts" of another kind -his auto¬
biographical film based on his
No. 1 bestseller of the same
name.
"Everybody knows me now
and what I do, so I wanted the
film to show how I got where I
am ioday," Stern says as he
settles into a chair to talk.
The radio 'shock jock" is tall,
well over six feet, and his face
is hidden by a mane of curly
black hair and a pair of dark sun¬
glasses. Still, he's talkative, re¬
laxed, friendly and refreshingly
open.
"For the audience, the film is
like having a camera spy on my
life," Stern said.
As a result, the film looks
Howard Stem
back at Stem's formative years, as
a Jewish kid from Long Island who
was raised by a tough father; as a
scraggly young man who couldn't
get a woman to even glance his way,
much less date him; and as a
talentless deejay with a ridiculously
high-pitched voice.
"Parts" also tracks Stern's life
and career as he meets his ever-pa¬
tient wife, Alison (played by Mary
McCormack), who put up with him
even when he discussed her miscar¬
riage on the air. It details how Stern
encounters his partners in comedy-
sidekick Robin Quivers, Jackie
Mart 1 i ng and Fred Norris, who play
themselves in the film-and as he
rises to prominence as a notorious
shock jock first in Washington,
D.C. and then at WNBC-AM in
Manhattan, fighting nervous-Nellie
management types all the way.
"There were so many things in
the book, like my relationships with
my parents, that I wanted in the
film. But," Stern says, "we had to
pick and choose the moments for
the film. I wanted some personal
stuff in there, and I wanted to show
the radio bits that were the most
outrageous at that point in my ca¬
reer. When I had the first Lesbian
Dating Game, advertisers canceled
left and right. The only people who
supported me were from the gay
community. They thought it was
great. The gay press was great."
And Stern is just warming up.
He describes more outrageous on-
air stunts.
"When I had the first naked
woman on the show, there were
lawyers outside banging on the
doors because that was outrageous.
The (NBC) general manager was
the guy I had a shoving match with
(and which Stem aired live). I knew
it was great radio, but, at the same
time I couldn't believe this is my
BOSS. How do I deal with this once
the microphone goes off?," he says.
"That's a big part of the movie,
dealing with these guys and keep¬
ing my job. In a way, it's a good
Rocky' story."
Stern, who a few years ago
nearly made a film about the adven¬
tures of a character named Fartman,
almost didn't play himself in
"Parts." Until Stem decided to play
Stern. Jeff Goldblum was under
consideration. Now, not surpris¬
ingly. Stem is pleased that he took
the role.
"There are times I go to a movie,
and it takes me 20 minutes to buy
someone in a part," he says. "That's
how I judged my own performance.
When I watched it for the first time
I said. 'I'm not uncomfortable with
this. I buy me in this role. It seems
real. I don't feel like I'm acting.' I
was generally pleased. I expected
to want to crawl up in a hole and
die."
All in all. Stem loves the film
and gets a huge kick out of boast¬
ing that it's one of Paramount Pic¬
tures' highest-testing movies ever.
Though it may make him a movie
star, he has no intention of giving
up his nationally-syndicated radio
show. Radio, explains the 43-
year-old father of three daugh¬
ters, is where he feels most com¬
fortable, most challenged. And.
of course, he gets to piss off a
lot of people each and every day.
'To the people who continue
to criticize me and say my show
is raunchy, I say, 'How can you
think that?' All we do is com¬
plain about how the media is ho¬
mogenized and dull," he says.
"Finally, somebody comes along
who is doing something differ¬
ent, and now you're going to
slam that? Why don't we rejoice
in that? How could you be
threatened by that?"
As the conversation tomes to
a close, it's pointed out to Stern
that, as the self-proclaimed
"King of AH Media," he has a
hit radio program, two best-sell¬
ing books and a Hugely profit¬
able pay-per-view special under
his belt. He has a major movie
coming out today and his per¬
sonality attracts millions of fans
and probably as many detrac¬
tors. Yet, when one watches the
film, it's obvious that Stem is a
good, old-fashioned dork who
lucked out and made it big.
Longpigs
Continued from page 3.
more upbeat tracks and has the danceable
quality that club college-nights thrive on.
The intro-is a bit familiar once more,
sounding almost identical to the title track
"The Bends" by Radiohead. But I was trying
to say Longpigs was original right?
Well, in many respects they are. With a
lead singer who likes to run naked through
the hills and a drummer from punk faves
Cabaret Voltaire, how can you go wrong?
Here's a nifty little quality - every mem¬
ber does vocals at some point or the another
on the album. '
Together, they create songs that are col¬
lectively pasionate and filled with conviction.
Their music is far from being the empty and
meaningless replays of older artists that seem
to dominate the radio waves these days.   *
There's a lot of real substance here, and
definite evidence of a pure desire to make
good music.
Here's a hint, if you like Radiohead, you'll
probably find Longpigs quite, well...quite
their equal. No insult intended.