1997_02 The Daily Collegian February 1997

              Timeout
THE DAILY
COLLEGIAN
Tuesday, February 4, 1997
COLLEGE HOROSCOPE
By Tom Shales
Washington Post Writers Group
Rhea Perlman called from Hol¬
lywood the other day - this sort of
thing happens all the time - hoping
to drum up interest in "Pearl." the
CBS sitcom in which she stars. The
show isn't performing terribly well
in the ratings and. Perlman admit¬
ted, hasn't been all it should be in
the quality department, either.
"We found we kept doing the
pilot over and over." Perlman said.
In the pilot, which aired last fall,
down-to-Earth, blue-collarly Pearl
Carraldo (Perlman, of course) got
the best of snooty college profes¬
sor Stephan Pynchon (Malcolm
McDowell) after enrolling in his
course as part of her back-to-school,
self-improvement program.
Mr. Hoity-Toity treated Pearl
w ith snide disdain but she shbt back
with an array of zesty, common-
sense zingers. The trouble was. this
ritual became tedious week after
week after week."We want to ex¬
pand the show and take it in new
directions," Perlrqan says. And not
a moment too soon.
The first example aired on CBS
last week (Wednesday Jan. 29) and
proved fresh and funny, with physi¬
cal humor replacing some of the
repetitious banter. Pearl and class¬
mates decided they had to break,
into the professor's hoW to re¬
trieve a flawed report and then re¬
place it w ith the correct one.
Pearl was lowered through the
skylight on a rope a la Tom Cruise
in "Mission: Impossible." When
she found herself dangling "within
millimeters of the sleeping
professor's nose, things got satis-
fyingly uproarious.
The next of the revamped
"Pearls" airs Wednesday. Feb. 5
(Channel 47 8:30 p.m.). It's a spe¬
cial occasion any way you look at
it.
Danny DeVito. Pcrlman's real-
life husband, guest stars as the head
of Swindon College. He's the dean
— Dean Martin, ha-ha — and he
lakes an instant and blinding shine
to Pearl, who reminds him of his
dead wife. As they make out pas¬
sionately in the kitchen after a din¬
ner party, he tells her to stop call-.
ing him "Dean Martin" and use his
first name. Aston.
Aston Martin, like the car. Get
it? Okay, it's kinda corny, but at
least the show is cheerful and good-
natured.
Alas, the writers decided that at
this point in the episode they needed
a food fight, so they force the char¬
acter of Prof. Pynchon to behave in
a way he never would, especially
since he's trying to get Dean Mar¬
tin to name him chairman of the
Please see SHALES page 5.
I
By-Linda
Aries (March 21-Aprll 19) If you
do. get a studious friend's notes. Ask for
personal luionng lo keep up with a hor¬
rendous assignment Tuesday and
Wednesday. On Thursday and Friday,
join a group gathered for a worthy cause
They need your enthusiasm to get their
plans off the ground Spend lime with a
quiet person over the weekend Offer
courage and you'll get hope in return
Taunts (April 20-May 20). Get a
foreign friend lo help with your language
lessons Tuesday and Wednesday Maybe
you'd better tape the lectuies Thursday
and Fnday — the facts are coming too
fast to take notes You and your besi
friend need to sneak away for a quiet
interlude over the weekend You need
some private time to recuperate
Gemini (May 21-June 21) If you
need money, apply for loans or a job on
Tuesday or Wednesday Thursday and
Friday are awesome for traveling, learn¬
ing a foreign language or falling in love
with a foreigner. Two out of three ain't
bad Do what you're supposed to be do¬
ing over the weekend, without being
nagged
Cancer (June 22-July 22) Don't
fret, you'll get some very significant stuff
accomplished Tuesday and Wednesday,
with the help of your mate Sign appli¬
cations and get them into the mail Thurs¬
day and Friday Chances arc good you'll
get w hat you want. Travel over the week -
end to the beach, if possible
Leo (July 23-Aug. 22) On Tuesday
and Wednesday, you'd better do your
work as if your life depended on it Get
your agent or attorney to make the calls
for you Thursday and Fnday. and cinch
the deal You may discover another
source of funding over the weekend A
quiet person is more influential than you*
realize, so be nice
Virao (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) No dam
age will be done Save as much time as
possible for planning with your sweet¬
heart Tuesday and Wednesday With
work and love, anything'v possible,
they're intertwined Thursday and Fnday
Luckily, you enjoy your job You and
your partner should be able to extncaic
yourselves from the hectic activity over
the weekend Do that
Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) Take care
of a domestic dispute on Wednesday and
decide on a new course of action Thurv
day A romantic commitment made ci¬
ther Thursday or Fnday could last a life¬
time Be careful what you say and to
whom Concentrate on homework'over
C. Black
the weekend, even if there are tantaliz¬
ing distractions.
Scorpio (Oct 24-Nov. 21) Be care¬
ful Tuesday and Wednesday are best for
learning by working with an expert Do¬
mestic responsibilities nag at you all
week long. Give in to their demands on
Thursday and Friday Although there's
still more to be done, you don't have to
do it all over the weekend Make plenty
of time for romance, too.
Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) Re¬
view matenal you should know by now
Go shopping for something that will
help you with your studies on Tuesday
and Wednesday Do your big research
project on Thursday and Fnday Take
care of stuff at home ovef the weekend
Invest in your roommates, plants and
pets.
Capricorn (Dec 22-Jan. 19) Make
weII-reasoned decisions about your fi¬
nances on Tuesday and Wednesday,
then go spend the money on Thursday
and Fnday. Get a big item that can he
updated later You may get so involved
in your studies over the weekend yi i
forget to come out for food Let you
answering machine take the calls
Aquarius (Jan 20-Ken. 18) Advise
him or her to go slowly You may dis¬
cover a requirement you forgot to meet
on Tuesday or Wednesday Don't freak
out. just do it You're incredible on
Thursday and Fnday Begin absolutely
everything you can imagine. Everything
from scientific lo romantic projects will
turn out well An older person could
come through with the money you need
over the weekend
Pisces (Feb. 19-March 201 An as
signment may change, so don't worry
about it Your fnends steer you in the
nght direction Tuesday and Wednesday
Take care of a problem Thursday or Fn •
day and it won't keep you awake nights
any longer You should sleep pretty well
Saturday and Sunday To make things
even better, go along with your
sweetheart's requests
K You're Having a Birthday This
Week ~. Born Feb. 4-5: Your assign¬
ment this year rs to complete all your
past assignments Realize your future
dreams by doing extensive research
Born Feb. 6-7: Your creativity and
imagination know no bounds Love and
luck are on your side, loo Do something
you can be proud of for the rest of your
life Born Feb. 8-9: If you invest wisely
you could make a lot of money this year
Just don't spend it as fast as you get it
Kennel Bookstore
Kennel Copy Center • 278-394S
Jfennel
Copy Center
^■r     M   %/        ^-^ocated on Ihe Lower Level
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/ Thesis Ordering / Course Packets
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5 Self-Service Copiers on Campus
Commons Lodge • USU • Peters Building • USU Pavilion
tFRESNO STATE
ACROSS
1 Seeks partner
5 Propa'ad a boat
10 Smear
14 PM parson
15 Valiant
10 — of Man
17 Ropo plant
18 —Uigti.
19 Headaner
20 Boamrxtious
22 Ump
24 Prfaf base
2flXmas
27 Tainted
31 Cfrded
35 Caviar base
36 Plumed bird
38 Willow
39 Large landmess
41 Eats
43 A Fitzgerald
44 Cares for
46 Abated
46 Morning
moisture
49 Assets
51 Carrie
Fisher/Harrison
Ford movie
53 Heap
55 Pump or brogan
56 Deli meat
60 Thought
64 European
capital
65 Copier need
67 Depend
68 God of thunder
69 Collars
70 Quantity of
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71 Places
72 Thick
73 Wallet Items
DOWN
1 Laugh
2 March date
3 Clammy
4 Kingdom
5 Protested
6 Parsogrwan o<
football
7 Author Ayn
3 — now and
them
9 Bypass
10 Dole out
11 — Spumante
12 —Bator
13 Ice floe
21 Wealthy
23 Potpoum
25 Scary
27 Angry
28 Pries
29 Deceptive action
30 Spanish toes ol
courtesy
32 Funny Radnor.
once
33 Certain    .
34 Pubs a gun from
ahotster
37 Hotbeds
40 Converters ol a
kind
42 Fish lhat swims
upright
45 Mix
47 Plunge
50 Very happy
52 Odd person
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54 ActMseaham
56 Kitchen items
57 Torino champ.
once
58 — macrw>e
59 Privy to
61 Kind of sign
62 Ullrrvatum word
63 Tints
66Nav.ofl.
TrlC  X>\^F€L-UUC of cHt<-bHOOt> MYTHS.    TvB   ffAR.
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1          Fresno State presents, the Comedy of
pelliteStudM^nion*
iTUESDWt, J    fe
fFEBRUARYMj
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Tickets iv.iilabic at the door
Student w/ ID S2.00
Gener.il S4.00
PROOIIUIIONS         ****^.«>
For information
call 278-2078
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